I just got ditched...

Yup...definitely...i dont get it though...you are the one who gave me your number...send your photos,vids...then now gitu gitu je eh tknk layan...it's not fair.  

Maybe there's a hidden reason...

Elephant

It feels different. It's like you dont want to talk to me at all.  Just say it.  Just say you dont want to talk to me at all and i will stop bugging you.  

I miss you so much. Everyday i just can't stop thinking about you.  What about you?  Do you feel the same? Do you miss me? Do you think about me at certain times?  

Arrysa.  I want to hold your hand so damn bad.  

Allah, help me in this.  For only you could help me.

Ditched?

Did i just got ditched? I feel like a joke.  To even go and create a video of her....hahaha...pathetic. 

Deep down,im shaking.

Deep down,im trembling.

Deep down,im crying.

Really. Am i really not worth your attention at all...at all??

Then why do you pay so much attention to me at first? Telling me about how hurt you are, sending me all thise pictures of yours.  Is all that even genuine? 

So am i just someone who you find when there's no one else you can find? 

Im such...a loser.  

Heartbroken me.

Descision

I guess...if this time you are still not gonna reply...or reply with a few sentence...then it's time for me to take a break...and emo again...hahaaaa... #mylovestory #myonesidedlovestory 

It'a all just a dream. Everything. I guess alive musuem and gardens by the bay can wait until im like 28...haha

Descision

I guess...if this time you are still not gonna reply...or reply with a few sentence...then it's time for me to take a break...and emo again...hahaaaa... #mylovestory #myonesidedlovestory 

It'a all just a dream. Everything. I guess alive musuem and gardens by the bay can wait until im like 28...haha

Busy?

Busy msg laki lain?sape si danial ali ni...hmm

Hmmm

It seems that you dont even bother to reply something or anything at all...

Am i lonely again?

Am i....zzzz

Haizz...maybe there's nothing worth paying attention in me...

I'll keep msging you until

Dissappointment? False hope? The same thing all over again?

Hmm...so who is it? 

I dont think it's me,cos aonce yesterday you nvr reply at all. Today, no difference, no reply. I know you are online. I know you are on the internet.  So no attention to me at all.  We are not couple or anything so i wont say anything to you.  But it hurts.

Sometimes i feel like giving up.  But i dont want to have the regrets of "if i know,i wont give up"

Am i really someone a girl not interested in at all? Destined to be single? Haha...

I hope, one day we'll go out.  Hope. It's what keeping me from giving up.  

I hope all this wont be....just a dream.

Your departure

Arrysa, i just hope that before you go, just say something to me.  I'll just wish for this, but even this small simple thing....i dont think i will ever get to see it.  I...i think i'm starting to have feelings for you.

The same thing

Sometimes, i think i found that someone, but it will end up not being that someone. 

Arry, i thought you will be my first, but how things are going, i can't see the future about US.  

Sometimes, we put a lot of effort to show that we care for that someone, and of course it's normal to expect the same from the other party, but it seems it doesnt go this way.  

You bring my hope so high that now, i feel like it's just a dream.  Dream, that's all the nearest i can get to you or all the prev girls that i got feelings for.  

I know there are things that you are not telling me.  I want to know cos i care, but it seems im not someone for you worth telling all that. I will miss you for the next 4 days. 

Arry.1

Hmmm...merajok?marah?or just not interested? It's better if you just say any of there straight to me...i dont like things that keep hanging me in one place...cos i wont know what's the progress.

It's just that i put so much effort, in chatting with you everyday...but i dont feel the same from you.  

Am i in a delusion? In my own world?please tell me. I can't keep going on like this....i just can't. I dont have anyone special to share my problems...i thought you will be the one.  But if it keeps going on like this, then i'm back to square one.  

I just need that special companion.  

Story 55

Pelok sane, pelok sini...haizzz. I can't tell what you are thinking...

Maybe im still in a delusional....damn me...

Story 54

I dont know already....it looks like im not in your interest? 

Im sick and tired of this.  

Azreena, arrysa...either of you...please...and i'll already be happy.

Story 53

Yeah!i managed to move on!!!finally...silver...thx for teaching me something. 

Anyway. This certain someone im contacting now, Arrysa...i dont know what i'm feeling with you right now...part of me want to have a go with you...but part of me warned me to be careful...haizz

You dont know what you got yourself into....you and that sweetestguy of yours....it could either break you...or makes you happy...let's see what's going to happen

And mamat, dont put your hopes too high!!!

Story 52

What im feeling now?

Sick and tired of falling in love, or even interested in someone, cos everytime i did, i still wont get that someone.

Really, im tired of having this feeling.  It never please me.  From the first person im in love until now.

But, you are out there somewhere right?  I hope it will be worth meeting you one day, whoever you are, my mystery woman. 

Story 51

Mad...just move on and forget about her.  Like what your friends said,there's still a lot more fish out there.

It's a clear message that she wants me out of her life. Unfollow me on ig? 

Heh.  Another fail and pathetic part of my love story.  As usual,it will end up one sided, and as usual,i wont get the gilr im interested in.

Oh so typical of me. 

Story 50

People say, stop finding a gf desperately and one day that special girl will come.

Some say,if you just dont find anyone, that special girl wont be able to find you too.

So my guts say...just do what you think is right.

I've unfriend you on fb,and im sure you dont know about it, of course, it'a cos you nvr really see me.  All i left now is your ig and soon i believe i need to unfollow you on ig too...

My love life sux.  It's always a one sided love, and i dont know what i did to deserve all this painful feelings,but i believe that all this happened for a reason and it serve me a lesson. 

Story 49

You replied but you replied to end it there. 
Everyday,i would always think of you.  Thinking how is it gonna be if i'm besides you now, how warmth it is to be with you, how much fun and smile i will make with you and just how does it feel to see your smile face to face.  But now, i guess i shld just move on? Forget you? Unfriend you in fb? Unfollow your ig?

I dont know anymore....

When i look at japan, new zealand, places that i want to travel, i would think of going there with you by my side, but it seems that's just wishful thinking.

I hope one day,our path will meet each other....

Story 48

Ok. I've done my part.

It's ok if you wont reply.  No,it's not ok, it's painful, but what can i do.  I can't force you to talk to me, pay attention to me and all. 

Heh,i guess shld really move on...? Unfollow her ig, then slowly, one day, her fb?  I think that's wise.  So im gonna wait until tomorrow morning?  😿😿

Story 47

Shaz...am i really invisible to you?  Am i really not even worth even a few seconds of your attention?  No likes, not from fb,ig or anywhere. 

If i really am, just show me that you are going out with somebody.  Because,only then,can i really stop hurting myself.

You stole my heart. 

I must be the most stupidest guy ever when it comes to love.

I want to see you.
I want to talk to you.
Chat with you.
Know you better, at least as a friend first.
Can't you give me any of this?
😔😔

Story 46

It's been a while.

Im still not able to forget you silver.  But i need this to go somewhere.  It cannot stay like this forever.  It needs to end, or develop into something else.

Sunday night,hari raya night, i will message her and apologize for being an annoying bugger who tried to win/attract her attention.  Maybe im going to tell her my honest feeling,and even tell her im going to  unfriend her in fb and also maybe instagram too. 

I need to do this or else,i will be swallowed too deep by this illusions that i've created.

Silver,no shaz, im really interested in you and really want to be friends with you and hopefully slowly we'll go out,and even marry you. 

I cant bear to carry on like this.  My heart is just too heavy now. 

Story 45

Met one of my close poly fren, a girl.

She told me i shld just let go of silver and go find others else i will only continue to hurt myself.  Part of me knows that she's true but part of me also knows that it's not easy for me to be so attracted to a girl.

Is this suffering of one sided love worth it?  Or shld i just heed my friend's advice?

Whatever it is i will always pray the best for you. 

Story 44

Being depressed,sad and lonely is really a suffering.

I dont even have that special someone to share all my problems with.  Pfft. Such a loner i am.

My wish is that you could pay attention to me, even for a moment.  Im not happy, but seeing you happy is a good thing but it also means that you dont even give a single twat about me. 

Cos if you are,you will be chatting with me. 😭😭

Story 43

So why did you delete that post?  Hn.

Story 42

It's so painful now.  One sided love.  And now you know that she just dont give a twat about you at all.  That's just the worst feeling ever for a one sided lover....hahaaa...

Allah,  now i really leave everything up to you.  Only You can work the impossible.

Story 41

That's the sign

'Gd for you'
"Why is it gd for me?"
'I dnt know'
'Goodnight:)'

Hahahaa.....she's clearly telling me she's not interested. 

Story 40

Hahaha.

I'm like listing down places i want to go and foodhunt!!!  But all these places have a requirement i've made on my own.  I need to bring my future girlfriend, so until i've got one, i wont go there.

Simple.

Man...

Story 39

Hmmm, just read a blog about how to know if a girl is interested in you through text.

And it seems like none of it, can be refered to me and silver.  Not that i dont know, but i just need to double confirm.

Lately,she posted a few pictures of her in instagram.  She's the most beautiful girl i've ever known.  With that bob haircut, the haircut that i really love, she completely stole my heart.  It wont be easy finding anyone to replace her.

Is my standards too high? I know im not that handsome,but....i've seen beautiful girls with their boyfriend, which honestly, is not that handsome. 

Please please please.  Im suffering.  I really need help.

Story 38

Haizz....

Why do you have to change to that dp?  Allah....

MasyaAllah, you are really beautiful you know.

Story 37

How? How to not love/like this girl? Her haircut is my style, her blood is my type as in half malay half chinese, even her character. 

Ya Allah, am i not suitable for her?  Or is she not suitable for me?

I am madly in love with her.  However,i've already promised myself that i wont initiate msging her, so i'll wait. 

Wait and suffer.  That's what i'll do.  I trust that Allah will provide me the best result and i believe Him. 

Silver, i really hope you will spend just a moment of your time, to pay attention towards me.  I know im not interesting during the chat. 

Haizzz....

Story 36

Just read a story about love,family, true love and all those kind of things.  Makes me wonder when will i even love someone and to be loved by that someone. 

Being single means you can mingle with a lot of peoples and there's freedom too i think.  But deep down, you know that you are missing something.  Deep down you know that there's that someone that you shld be talking to, sharing your stories all, that is not there. 

It's a lonely freedom route.  I want to feel it.  That hunger for love.  That nervousness when you see that person. 

Im just lost in this love thingy.  I'm just stupid and too naive and nice when it comes to love.  Who knows, maybe if im daring during my secondary school life, i might just have that someone already. 

:')

Story 35

I think it's time.
It's time for me to stop bugging her.  Yup, not chatting with her, cos i think everytime i chat with her,it's like bugging her.  So, to avoid being an anooying person, i will stop fb chat with you silver.

Time for me to leave everything in God's hand and leave it up to fate.  Tawakkal je la.....

:')  22 this year and still single.  Im just suck at this.  Whoever you are outside there, i will be waiting.

Story 34

It's just so freaking heartache and tiring and painful for the fact that i can only be happy with you when i dream of you.  Cos dreaming is not enough.

Ya Allah.  Please help me in this relationship.  Or even friendship.  For i really feel that there's something in her.

Story 33

Ok then.  Let's see what happened when you are not busy.  Hopefully it will bring good news to me. To us.

Story 32

Wth did i just did!!!?? Aargh! I think it's a disaster

Story 31

Haizzz...silver.

I just want to talk to you.  Can't we be talking buddies? You and me?  I may have lot of friends, but i dont really have a that someone that i can share everything. 

Just so you know.  Everyday, just looking at your picture can make me smile, but it can also makes me feel so sad.

I hope you will just spend a bit of your time...just to say hi to me maybe...heh.

Story 30

Hmmm. It looks like you dont give a twat about my msg? It's normal.  But everytime it still hurts.  It hurts that the fact that you feel like that happinness when talking to you and that flickering hope suddenly gone. 

Haizz...that silent treatment

Story 29

Still nothing from silver.  Heh, maybe im expecting too much.  Maybe i shld just find other peeps.  But silver really stole my heart add attention.  It wont be easy to get back those two from silver.  I wonder what do you think of me? 

Anyway, damn it, i've start smoking.  Oh wellzz....

Story 28

Hey!!

Looks like another emo story.  Im sorry that whoever is reading this, you only see my emo story. I hope one day i will post my happy love story.  Look forward to it!!

Back to track,
Im gonna nickname this girl,silver.  She's a mix blood,older than me by 5 years, she likes cats!! And i love them too!  She's funky,funny and she's just the kind that i really like.  I like every bits of her.  But all i could do, was dream of her.  I dont mind about how old my partner is.  Young, old, i dont give a shit if i've fallen for her.  But does she care if im younger than her.  She doesnt look like she's interested in me :')

SO why?
Why?
Why do i always fell for someone who i wont get.  Part of me is saying that it's me, the reason im single all along.  Im just sucks at this BGR thing.  Maybe this is like some sort of test that it takes forever for me to pass. 

Sometimes, all i hope for everyday is for you to just like 1 of my fb post, pr wven comment it.  Or even say hi to me.

Or maybe when i woke up one morning, i'll see you text me hi good morning!  Or maybe at night,you'll just randomly wish me good night before you/me going off to sleep.

Hahaahahhaaa.....
Im laughing at myself cos i look so pathetics as i wish for all those things. 

Just so you know silver,  everyday, i always pray for you and me and us.  I hope Allah will help me in this.

Again,sorry for the weak emo shit story readers!

If i have a reader. Weee!