Being depressed,sad and lonely is really a suffering.
I dont even have that special someone to share all my problems with. Pfft. Such a loner i am.
My wish is that you could pay attention to me, even for a moment. Im not happy, but seeing you happy is a good thing but it also means that you dont even give a single twat about me.
Cos if you are,you will be chatting with me. 😭😭
It's so painful now. One sided love. And now you know that she just dont give a twat about you at all. That's just the worst feeling ever for a one sided lover....hahaaa...
Allah, now i really leave everything up to you. Only You can work the impossible.
That's the sign
'Gd for you'
"Why is it gd for me?"
'I dnt know'
'Goodnight:)'
Hahahaa.....she's clearly telling me she's not interested.
Hahaha.
I'm like listing down places i want to go and foodhunt!!! But all these places have a requirement i've made on my own. I need to bring my future girlfriend, so until i've got one, i wont go there.
Simple.
Man...
Hmmm, just read a blog about how to know if a girl is interested in you through text.
And it seems like none of it, can be refered to me and silver. Not that i dont know, but i just need to double confirm.
Lately,she posted a few pictures of her in instagram. She's the most beautiful girl i've ever known. With that bob haircut, the haircut that i really love, she completely stole my heart. It wont be easy finding anyone to replace her.
Is my standards too high? I know im not that handsome,but....i've seen beautiful girls with their boyfriend, which honestly, is not that handsome.
Please please please. Im suffering. I really need help.
Haizz....
Why do you have to change to that dp? Allah....
MasyaAllah, you are really beautiful you know.
How? How to not love/like this girl? Her haircut is my style, her blood is my type as in half malay half chinese, even her character.
Ya Allah, am i not suitable for her? Or is she not suitable for me?
I am madly in love with her. However,i've already promised myself that i wont initiate msging her, so i'll wait.
Wait and suffer. That's what i'll do. I trust that Allah will provide me the best result and i believe Him.
Silver, i really hope you will spend just a moment of your time, to pay attention towards me. I know im not interesting during the chat.
Haizzz....
Just read a story about love,family, true love and all those kind of things. Makes me wonder when will i even love someone and to be loved by that someone.
Being single means you can mingle with a lot of peoples and there's freedom too i think. But deep down, you know that you are missing something. Deep down you know that there's that someone that you shld be talking to, sharing your stories all, that is not there.
It's a lonely freedom route. I want to feel it. That hunger for love. That nervousness when you see that person.
Im just lost in this love thingy. I'm just stupid and too naive and nice when it comes to love. Who knows, maybe if im daring during my secondary school life, i might just have that someone already.
:')
I think it's time.
It's time for me to stop bugging her. Yup, not chatting with her, cos i think everytime i chat with her,it's like bugging her. So, to avoid being an anooying person, i will stop fb chat with you silver.
Time for me to leave everything in God's hand and leave it up to fate. Tawakkal je la.....
:') 22 this year and still single. Im just suck at this. Whoever you are outside there, i will be waiting.
It's just so freaking heartache and tiring and painful for the fact that i can only be happy with you when i dream of you. Cos dreaming is not enough.
Ya Allah. Please help me in this relationship. Or even friendship. For i really feel that there's something in her.
Ok then. Let's see what happened when you are not busy. Hopefully it will bring good news to me. To us.
Haizzz...silver.
I just want to talk to you. Can't we be talking buddies? You and me? I may have lot of friends, but i dont really have a that someone that i can share everything.
Just so you know. Everyday, just looking at your picture can make me smile, but it can also makes me feel so sad.
I hope you will just spend a bit of your time...just to say hi to me maybe...heh.
Hmmm. It looks like you dont give a twat about my msg? It's normal. But everytime it still hurts. It hurts that the fact that you feel like that happinness when talking to you and that flickering hope suddenly gone.
Haizz...that silent treatment
Still nothing from silver. Heh, maybe im expecting too much. Maybe i shld just find other peeps. But silver really stole my heart add attention. It wont be easy to get back those two from silver. I wonder what do you think of me?
Anyway, damn it, i've start smoking. Oh wellzz....
Hey!!
Looks like another emo story. Im sorry that whoever is reading this, you only see my emo story. I hope one day i will post my happy love story. Look forward to it!!
Back to track,
Im gonna nickname this girl,silver. She's a mix blood,older than me by 5 years, she likes cats!! And i love them too! She's funky,funny and she's just the kind that i really like. I like every bits of her. But all i could do, was dream of her. I dont mind about how old my partner is. Young, old, i dont give a shit if i've fallen for her. But does she care if im younger than her. She doesnt look like she's interested in me :')
SO why?
Why?
Why do i always fell for someone who i wont get. Part of me is saying that it's me, the reason im single all along. Im just sucks at this BGR thing. Maybe this is like some sort of test that it takes forever for me to pass.
Sometimes, all i hope for everyday is for you to just like 1 of my fb post, pr wven comment it. Or even say hi to me.
Or maybe when i woke up one morning, i'll see you text me hi good morning! Or maybe at night,you'll just randomly wish me good night before you/me going off to sleep.
Hahaahahhaaa.....
Im laughing at myself cos i look so pathetics as i wish for all those things.
Just so you know silver, everyday, i always pray for you and me and us. I hope Allah will help me in this.
Again,sorry for the weak emo shit story readers!
If i have a reader. Weee!
